There is something inquisitive about human nature, something that makes a person want to look over a wall or wonder what is in a closed box. It is this questioning instinct that I believe has led mankind to every major breakthrough in history. This yarning to discover the unknown has prompted our species to climb mountains, conquer previously unknown continents and even visit our celestial neighbors across the cold inhospitable blackness of space. Such a desire burned within me, and this was probably the impetus that nudged at me one morning as I ate breakfast. In a flash of clarity I knew what I must do. This day would be the day that I would make my explorations into the undergrowth of the back yard.One look at this neglected and unkempt woodland convinced me that I would need some kind of assistance, so I decided to arm myself with the mechanical hedge trimmer and to deal with the more stubborn growth I would utilize the finger crusher. But the hedge trimmer required access to electricity and the undergrowth that was my target was some considerable distance away. I began connecting together all the extension cords that I owned, but discovered to my dismay that the total length was still insufficient to provide power to the electric trimmer. I even added three strings of outdoor Christmas lights (taking care to replace the flimsy fuse with a drywall screw to ensure continued power delivery) but still it would not reach. Clearly this was a job for the machete.
I descended the slop into the green darkness. It wasn’t long before I was forced to begin chopping away at the bushes that impeded my progress, swinging my machete back and forth vigorously, obliterate the thick growth of foliage to form a path downwards. I think it was actually a good thing that my electric trimmer couldn’t be used because the steel jungle knife, made me feels much more like a real explorer. The forest was teaming with wildlife, I heard evidence of it all around, rustling leaves and creaking branches, the chirping of what I felt sure must be some exotic species of bird. But most of the creatures that inhabited this wild place were to small to see. They made their presence felt only by producing irritating welts upon my skin, red swellings that began to itch so badly that I wanted to run back to my tool shed and scour them with sandpaper, but I pressed on. My legs from the knees down were hidden beneath thick tangles of ferns and thorny brambles that made me wish I had worn long pants.
I began to entertain thoughts of poisonous snakes, fearing that if I were killed in this inhospitable place I might not be discovered for decades. So intent was I in watching for these serpents of death that I ran into an extensive conglomeration of cobwebs, and the likelihood of being bitten by a poisonous spider was added to my growing list of fears. I continued on down the steep slope, cutting my way through creeping vines that seemed to reach out and ensnare my limps, probably to immobilize me so that the giant termites could finish the job.
Then I stopped transfixed by the sound reaching my ears. Beyond the sound of the rustling leaves and the squirming of some strange animal I could hear the unmistakable sound of trickling water. This is the moment in every explorer’s life when he feels a sense of fulfillment. Water is after all one of the primary substances that sustains life, and very often the main reasons for the exploration in the first place. Filled with a new found enthusiasm, I pressed on down the treacherous slope that had now become quite slippery. The last twenty feet or so were accomplished in the sitting position after losing my balance and sliding down a steep embankment of wet ferns, slippery rotting leaves and some more of the thorny brambles. I finally came to rest on the edge of a gully, below me a crystal clear stream was winding its way through the rocks and I felt that I understood how those great nineteenth century explorers in Africa must have felt when discovering Victoria Falls of the source of the Nile.
All the hardships and torment of encountering hazardous animal and plant life that stings, bites and scratches now seemed worth it, all the thoughts that I had previously entertained about running from this terrible place, never to return were forgotten. I crawled back up the hill to look for a first aid kit.
